I used to have a sex couch. It was repulsively disgusting and covered in the fluids of so many lovers that sometimes, when my apartment heated up, it smelled like funk. I was gross in my early 20s.
Nasty, filthy and gross.
That’s why I got laid all the time…and why I ended up sharing the love and creating porno for the world to enjoy.
There are a bazillion videos that feature my Sex Couch because no bodily fluids were allowed on my for real couch…but you could shoot spunk all God damn dan on the Sex Couch. When I finally got rid of it during a movie, I had to make up, “I spilled a crock pot of soup,” lies because my step-dad and mom were asking about the stains.
Don’t judge me. The Sex Couch was always a party and everyone was invited.
In the GQ article linked below, the author talks about how couch sex gets a bad rap. Couch fucking isn’t just for teenagers who are trying to fake watching a movie. Everyone wants to bang on the bed when they are older and in relationships. Of course there are outside-the-box fantasies about fucking at work and outside…but what about a good old fashioned romp on the couch.
Like the author, as soon as I hit my head to the pillow, I’m out for the count. Beds are totally for sleeping, and for the occasional under the mattress rope bondage session. There are plenty of other places in your home that you can break in with a little bit of lovin’. All you need to do is be a bit creative about it.
When is the last time that you had an orgasm on your couch, Peepz? I don’t care if it was a solo sesh or an orgy. Let me know in the comments or hit me up on twitter because you’re shy and don’t want to share with the class.
In the meantime, here’s a PornHub clip of some couch sex to get you in the mood for this evening.
Source: GQ
Image: Danni Daniels and Remy Lacroix in Casting Couch Cuties by Brazzers
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