Memory Foam Mattress Will Never Forget Your Dildos?

Moving sucks. You turn your whole world upside down, put it into tiny boxes, and beg your friends to help you wade through years of accumulated clutter. Getting through the process without infuriating any loved ones or having someone make a humiliating discovery is nothing short of a miracle.

After all nothing ruins the mood quite like a battle-worn butt plug or Fleshlight clumsily rolling from its hiding place the instant someone goes to move your bed.

While there’s nothing to be ashamed of by owning and using sex toys, they’re still something you would want to keep private. Before inviting people into your bedroom it would be wise to first find any personal items and move them to a new discreet location. Even then you aren’t completely safe- which is a lesson one woman learned the hard way.

She had apparently asked a friend to help her move and despite removing her assortment of sex toys from under her memory foam mattress beforehand, their imprint was left behind. After recognizing the highly detailed shapes left in the foam, the friend promptly snapped a picture and uploaded it to the internet. Hilarity ensued.

The image was uploaded by Imgur user Mentosfresh with the caption: “Friend moving her mattress today. Guess you can tell what was stored underneath?” It quickly went viral after being viewed nearly 3 million times in just two days. Yikes!

Users had fun with the request to guess what left the imprints, suggesting everything from “little log men with hard hats” to “nunchucks.” All jokes aside, many users were impressed by the woman’s wide assortment of sex toys.

You do you, girl. Literally.

While it may have been cruel for this friend to share such a private image, the owner of the bed and dildos wasn’t named and she should be able to continue an anonymous, sexually satisfied life in her new home. Still, I can’t help but grumble at this new age of narcissism where genuine moments of hilarity like finding the negative space once occupied by your friend’s dildo can’t be enjoyed unless it’s uploaded to the internet for approval from strangers. Hmph!

Image: Elsa Jean in The Cocksuckers Club by Brazzers

Via dailymail.co.uk

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