Public masturbation is one of my favorite things to get away with. The thrill of sneaking my hand down into my panties to dittle with my clit while I’m at a stop light is what I live for. I’ve definitely gotten away with a whole lot of solo public sex acts in my day, but I’m always super careful because you can’t trust that everyone out in public is as perverted as we are.
A man in Pinellas, Florida was arrested the last week in October when he was snagged doing something dirty in the town’s Target. He went into the store in the middle of the afternoon and made a beeline for the toy section. The stuffies (not stiffies, mind you) happened to look rather appealing to the 20-year-old man, so he first opted for an Olaf doll.
In case you don’t obsessively watch Disney movies with your family like I am forced to, Olaf is a snowman in the movie Frozen. He’s goofy looking and I’m not exactly sure why he’d be appealing to a rogue masturbator, but when in Florida, do as the Floridians do!
After Cody Christopher Meader, a St. Petersburg, Florida resident, dry humped Olaf, he proceeded to splooge all over the plush and put him back on the shelf. He was still hungry for more of that soft, fluffy loving though, so he brought a huge unicorn down off the shelf, laid on top of it and then started doing the same thing.
Store employees had already alerted the police though, so they came in and stormed the castle before more jizz ended up on the poor, defenceless unicorn. He was obviously arrested and, at the time of me writing this post, he is being held in jail.
I can kind of understand the draw of fucking stuffed animals. Back in the day, I shot a video where my teddy bear was strapped up and it was definitely a blast to make. I just think that you should actually purchase the stuffies before you fuck them. And probably don’t blow your load all over products at Target as a general rule.
If you’re intrigued, here’s my Xtube clip from ten fucking years ago because I’m aging faster than fine wine.
Betty the Teddy Bear powered by XTube
The lesson to learn here is definitely that Florida men will do whatever it takes to get their rocks off…so hide your Olafs and hide your unicorns. Now that this news story is being reported on, it may become a trend.
Source: Orlando Sentinel
Image: Cali Carter in Store Whore Credit by Brazzers
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