Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Sex News: Donald Trump Golden Shower Edition

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I did it again. I masturbated in the hot tub at the gym. I should really stop it… one of these days someone is going to see me on the security feed and I’ll be barred from ever working out again.

The dossier, which is a collection of memos written over a period of months, includes specific, unverified, and potentially unverifiable allegations of contact between Trump aides and Russian operatives, and graphic claims of sexual acts documented by the Russians. BuzzFeed News reporters in the US and Europe have been investigating various alleged facts in the dossier but have not verified or falsified them. CNN reported Tuesday that a two-page synopsis of the report was given to President Obama and Trump.

Trump-Golden

The document that started it all.

B. “Humiliation Play” is…

– engaged between consenting adults as temporary play for creating an erotic charge.

– this is done through temporary challenge to, or temporary removal of, arbitrary social construct and performance of the “self” that we adhere to in order to “fit in”. These are done with aspects of the performance of the self that are not deeply core to who we are.

When that happens, we experience momentary emotional and social dissonance which causes blushing squirming and sense of hyper self focus — same physiological response as many sexual responses beyond the genitals.

The play is often hottest and healthy when it’s accompanied by praise or erotic touch for breaking these social norms.

[…]

– There are HUGE differences between what The Donald does and what a person engaging in erotic dominance does.

Trump-Golden-Shower

The Donald needs to take a sex lesson from Midori.

We, along with the rest of the free world, are intrigued by the report alleging President-Elect Donald Trump employed sex workers to perform a “golden showers” show in the presidential suite of the Ritz Carlton hotel in Moscow.

However, while many media outlets are content running a story based on conjecture and rumor, we at Penthouse are committed to the value of getting the story right rather than getting it first. So we are offering up to $1-million to secure exclusive rights to the FSB tapes documenting Trump’s Russian hotel hijinks. After all, seeing is believing.

Penthouse Magazine has a rich history of celebrating people’s differences, fetishes and sexual preferences. We have also made great steps educating the public on the difference in having wild kinky fun versus engaging in risky or damaging behavior. We are comfortable giving our president-elect the benefit of the doubt, but if this footage exists, we the people deserve to know the truth.

Golden-Trump-Urinal

PLEASE, someone make this happen!

Samantha Bee took on Trump’s golden showers story last night and admitted that “the only verifiable thing about this report is how much joy it gave me.”

“There’s a high probability this story is bullshit,” she adds, “but the fact that it’s plausible bullshit is a terrifying statement about what our nation has come to.”

Women are funny.

Millionaire real estate tycoon Domald Tromp was born into wealth and, because of this, he’s grown thirsty for something more from life; something a little darker, a little weirder, a little more taboo. To satiate these cravings of the forbidden, Domald has embarked on one of his usual trips to Russian. Little does he know that this particular vacation will change his life forever.

Followed around by a camera crew from the Buttz Carlton Hotel, Domald turns Moscow upside down; sampling some illegal unicorn horn cuisine and hiring a handsome gay T-Rex prostitute. But when Domald suggests the handsome dinosaur pee on his butt, a political scandal begins to unfold unlike anything in the history of hardcore anal pounding!

This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay Russian dinosaur prostitute action, including anal, blowjobs, cream pies, rough sex, facials, watersports and corrupt political figure love.

This is the second best thing I’ve seen all week.

British cult artist/musician/poet/author and anti-authoritarian legend Billy Childish has just announced publication of a trio of specially commission poster prints commemorating “the occasion of Donald Trump being crassly maligned by the world’s press.”

The posters were created at the L-13 Light Industrial Workshop. Each measure 52.5 x 35 cm and are in stamped and numbered editions of 113 for £25.00 each. All posters come folded and in a deliberately distressed condition. The first orders will be dispatched on January 19th.

Mr. Childish is represented by L-13 in London, Neugerriemschneider in Berlin and Lehmann Maupin in New York.

Donald-Pissing-1 Donald-Pissing-2 Donald-Pissing-3 Donald-Pissing-4

Gimme all the posters.

Follow Lola Byrd on Twitter @misslolabyrd



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