Today’s link roundup is just full of joy! That was sarcasm by the way. There’s so much suck in the following three articles. Read only if you need a little anger to help you get through your day.
Netflix’s new documentary “Hot Girls Wanted: Turned On” is ostensibly a series about the intersection of sex and technology, but its main focus is the treatment and experience of women in the porn industry. Now, at least four sex workers feel the show itself has exploited them — by allegedly featuring them without their consent and, in one case, outing a performer’s real name.
The series, co-produced by actress Rashida Jones, is a follow-up to the 2015 documentary “Hot Girls Wanted,” which cast a highly critical eye on the amateur porn industry in Florida. The sequel paints a more complex picture of the broader adult industry, interviewing feminist pornographers and a do-gooder talent recruiter, but it remains focused on issues around objectification and empowerment. That makes the allegations against the documentary series especially relevant.
Holy shit that sucks! I don’t understand people who harm women under the guise of “helping” them, as if grown ass women don’t have agency, don’t have a choice. I’m all for turning a critical eye at shady practices in the porn industry, but not at the expense of hurting the very people you say you want to help. In case you can’t tell this kind of hypocrisy really pisses me off.
A new study explores the phenomenon of “stealthing” ― the purposefully nonconsensual removal of condoms during sex ― and how those who fall victim to the practice can move forward.
The study, written by Alexandra Brodsky for the Columbia Journal of Gender and Law, features interviews with victims of stealthing. Brodsky also does a deep dive into the online world of men who feel entitled to “bareback” sex without their partner’s consent, regardless of that partner’s gender.
Ultimately, Brodsky argues, stealthing is an act of gender-based violence that may violate a number of civil and criminal laws.
[…]
Brodsky highlights the online communities who defend stealthing as a male “right,” particularly a right of every man to “spread his seed” ― regardless of if said man is engaging in straight or gay penetrative sex. The study quotes from comment threads and forums in which men “train” other men about stealthing best practices, and offer support and advice in their pursuit of nonconsensual condom removal during sex.
I’ve had this happen to me twice. Okay, once. Once for sure and that other time I have strong suspicions it happened again, but I couldn’t prove it. Despite all of that, I had no idea stealthing was a thing. I just read a thread where some guy was describing all the techniques he uses to remove condoms without his various partners finding out and it is one of the most disturbing things I’ve ever read. Apparently, these douche bros think it’s okay to do this to someone because it’s a man right to spread his seed as he pleases. Ugh.
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I Went to a Sex Party I Found on the Internet and It Was Terrible (Good Housekeeping)
Approximately two hours ago, a guy I had been casually seeing had bailed on our apparently-not-so-concrete plans. Chris*, cute guy whose messages I had somersaulted through, had been giving me the freeze and in true miserable, self-loathing fashion, I could feel my fondness for him growing with every 24-hour communication freeze he apparently thought appropriate to punctuate our texts with. It was time to deal with the facts: He was ghosting me, hard.
Minutes one through 10 were sad, until I decided to dedicate my life to the church of I’m Actually Incredibly Unbothered. In a moment of manic posturing to prove that one man’s actions didn’t have the capacity to break me down, I searched “sex party nyc today” on a social network site for the kink community. Somehow, I convinced my friend Kelsey* (my bravest and best wingwoman) to come along with me.
[…]
Another young guy walked in with an older woman behind him. The older woman was probably in her 50s or 60s, but it was hard to tell because her skin was so wrinkled. She was wearing a strapless tube top and the self-tanner crevices in her neck revealed little slits of pink freckled skin. You can lie to yourself about a lot of things, but it’s hard to find a reason to stay at a sex party after running into a woman old enough to be your grandma trying to have sex with the same sample of people you took a $35 UberX to meet.
The woman who wrote this article is the type of person I really fucking dislike. I hate read that article. HATE READ. That said, I’ve never been to a sex party and I feel like I should definitely add that to the ol’ bucket list.
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