It’s Harlot’s 40th Birthday, Let’s Party

I’m officially a 40-year-0ld woman today. This is both surprising and exciting to me. Internally, I feel like I’ll always be in my early 30s, because that was a hell of a time. My knees and the fact that I take meds on the daily remind me that I’m getting older though.

It was strange to me when Dana DeArmond started calling herself a cougar and a MILF, but that’s exactly where I’m at. When Peepz hit me up on social networking sites, they say that they’ve been fans of mine for over a decade. That in and of itself is strange to me. Jerking off to some clips that I threw together an entire lifetime ago when I was slutting around the tri-state area on the hunt for adventures. All of that shit happened lifetimes ago, but I’m proud of who I’ve Evolved into.

How am I celebrating my 40th birthday sexually? I’m going to be working on stretching out my butthole so that when this whole quarantine is lifted, I can get my ass fucked proper by the new lady I’m talking to. I know it’s going to be a few months, so I’ll have plenty of time doing solo anal acrobatics before I have to even think about someone else rimming me.

Back in my 20s, I always said that doing a MMF was going to be my mid-life crisis fantasy. While I’m not in “crisis mode,” yet…I’m beginning to rethink my younger self. What if I keep that MMF in my pocket and just never do it? I mean, anal stretching seems like it would be a good place for me to expand my repertoire while I’m entering middle aged. I enjoy the company of women so much that at this point there are only two men in my life that I would consider having sex with….but I am fairly certain that one of those men would not be OK with also having sex with the other guy.

I want my fantasies to be completely fulfilled the way I’ve been dreaming about them. It isn’t really an MMF that I want, it’s an MFM…like the content that Wolf Hudson has been filming lately. I want bi guys who are totally into pleasing each other and pleasing me all at the same time. I don’t need to be the center of attention the entire time, but I do need to tick the right boxes in my own head.

I’ve had sex with tons of people. While I’m reflecting back, not a lot of it was good sex. For me it was all about having the experience rather than being satisfied. My 40s are going to be completely different.

I want orgasms from my partners. I crave intensity and knowing that my partner is both enjoying what I’m doing and enjoying me as well. No more masturbating after the person has left my bedroom so that I can get off too. Only good lovers need apply to be in between my legs and if that means that I ostracize exs, so be it.

No more bad dick. No more bad kissers. No more compromising my own fantasies to make other people’s come true. I’m so excited to continue on with my own sexual adventures and learn as much as I can about what I want and need in my life.

Happy 40th birthday to me, Peepz. It’s going to be a good one. Buy me presents if you’d like.

Image: Harlot’s Secret Stash

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