I realized this morning that I don’t want to compromise anymore when it comes to my sex life. Sure dating apps are fun to mess around on, but I’m not clicking with very many people and I realized that I’m OK with that. The next person who gets to bang me is going to have their work cut out for them, I swear.
Because I orgasm as quickly as I do, my previous partners (not my ex-wife…back further than that) had a tendency to think that one orgasm was totally enough to satisfy me. They would make me cum and then the rest of the session would be focused on getting them off.
That is not the Droid I’m looking for.
I want 20 orgasms in one sex session. Does that seem like a lot? That’s because it is. My body deserves every single one of those explosions. When I’m fucking, I’m giving 100% of myself to my partner, whether it’s a one night stand or a long term relationships…or even something in between.
I started to make a handwritten list of things that will help me manifest the sex life I’m looking for and I wanted to share it with my favorite Peepz. As with my actual self, this list will be ever evolving. If there’s one thing I’ve got right now, it’s time to edit.
- Because I want my partner to know my body, I must spend time getting to know my body all over again. The person who I was in my 20s and 30s has changed. All aspects of my life are different and I should not expect my reaction to touch to stay the same.
- I will put effort and energy into finding friends who turn into sex partners. My days of slutting around just for the story are over. The quality of the people that I decide to fuck must be on my level.
- Communication is key in every relationship. I will speak my mind, no matter how filthy it is, or how embarrassed or shy I am. I will tell my partners of my needs whether we are in a sexual situation or not.
- There is a need in my life for hard, rough, kinky sex. I am not ashamed of this desire and I expect my partners to also be unashamed. Within shame there is hesitation. Within hesitation mistakes can be made.
That being said…
- My partners will be open to experimenting and learning about kink in a safe, sane and consensual manner. I will provide instruction when necessary, but will also allow myself the power to relinquish control, to let my partners grow and to fully experience submission (safely. I’m going to keep using that word, I don’t care how repetitive it is).
I think the most important thing that I have realized while I’m doing this deep mental dive into my own sexual being is that I am no longer interested in providing pleasure without reciprocation. So much of my life was spent pleasing other people. While I enjoyed doing that in the moment, now it is my turn to be pleased.
Do you Peepz have any sexually related goals? Is there anything you are going to be on the lookout for when it comes time to find your next partner? Let me know in the comments below or slide into my DMs on twitter if you’d like to chat about it.
Image: Harlot’s Private Stash
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